These benefits do not end in childhood. Life without physical contact with others can be a lonely life indeed. Studies have shown that affectionate touch actually boosts the body’s levels of oxytocin, a hormone that influences bonding and attachment. In a committed relationship between two adult partners, physical intercourse is often a cornerstone of the relationship. However, intercourse should not be the only method of physical intimacy in a relationship. Regular, affectionate touch—holding hands, hugging, or kissing—is equally, and sometimes even more important to your partner. While touch is a key part of a healthy relationship, it’s important to take some time to find out what your partner really likes. Unwanted touching or inappropriate overtures can make the other person tense up and retreat—exactly what you don’t want. Coming to terms and creating your own agreements within your relationship will allow for you two to understand these needs and wants more clearly. Why play the guessing game when we are perfectly capable of communicating just what it is that we are looking for? You probably have fond memories of when you were first dating your loved one. Everything seemed new and exciting, and you may have spent hours just chatting together or coming up with new, exciting things to try. However, as time goes by, children, demanding jobs, long commutes, different hobbies and other obligations can make it hard to find time together. It’s critical for your relationship to make time for yourselves. If you don’t have quality time, communication and understanding start to erode. With quality time spent with one another you are allowing a space for connection and physical intimacy to take place. Without the time set aside to just be with one another, physical intimacy can become mundane and even planned to fit into your busy lifestyles. I can guarantee there aren’t many people looking for a planned out sex life... Keep in mind that quality time is not the two of you doing your own thing in the same room, running errands or reading your own books. It’s about setting dedicated time to one another without distractions. Commit to spending quality time together on a regular basis. Even during very busy and stressful times, a few minutes of really sharing and connecting can help keep bonds strong. Take a bath together or make a delicious dinner to enjoy with one another. Find something that you enjoy doing together, whether it is a shared hobby, dance class, daily walk, or sitting over a cup of coffee in the morning. Get creative with what you two enjoy doing! Try something new together. Doing new things together can be a fun way to connect and keep things interesting. It can be as simple as trying a new restaurant or going on a day trip to a place you’ve never been before. Exercising together is a fulfilling activity to commit to together and it can even boost your sex drive. .
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